meandering musings by marie

wander with me

forever begins now May 17, 2009

Filed under: Experiences — marie @ 10:29 pm
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Something happened to me this evening that turned my whole body into Jello.

Very. Excited. Jello.

The best place to start these type things is the beginning, but that was so long ago and the journey so arduous that I must needs save it for another day. So instead, please allow me to begin at the commencement of this chapter.

Last week as I was preparing to come home from school for the summer, Beloved and I decided that we wanted to spend an evening together sometime this weekend. He told me to choose a place to eat and that he’d pick me up at five o’clock (I chose Ruby Tuesday, for the record). We enjoyed a simple, savory meal there, after which he asked if I’d like to go for a walk somewhere; he claimed his legs were stiff from driving and sitting all day and could use a good stroll. Once we had finished bandying about our options, we settled on the nearby wildlife refuge and set off.

Finding a good place to walk around proved difficult. The day being a Sunday, the visitors’ center was closed as was the refuge office. So, we took a turn on the next promising road and began exploring. The first place we found was at a boat ramp with a lovely view of the sun and the water… and a large dead fish. The last bit kept us at bay in the car, so Beloved suggested a relocation. Off we went, taking one road and then another until we were on a single-lane gravel path which followed the river bank awhile before passing beneath the interstate and veering into a mown-down cornfield. The views to be had on the water always make for good photography, so I alighted onto a slightly muddy path and captured several moments through my camera lens.

It being a chilly evening, especially for the time of year, Beloved asked if I’d like to take a walk to warm up. If we went up the path a little ways, he pointed out, I might be able to get some good sunset photos. So up we went, pausing every now and then so I could lean precariously over the water and snap a few shots. Eventually we decided we’d gone far enough and stopped to take it all in. Leaning against him with his arms around me, I was quite shielded against the wind and cold; but being the considerate man he is, he asked if I was warm enough.

“Yes, I’m warm. I’m with you, aren’t I? That’s always enough.”

“Good.” (pause) “Know something?”

“What’s that?”

“You can be [with me] like this much more… starting now… if you say yes.”

And in less time than it took for me to react, he was on one knee opening a little red jewelry box and slipping the ring on my finger. Enter Jello-legs.

Right now I am happier than I have ever been before! I don’t know if or when I will sleep tonight; but if I do doze off, I can finally put a face to the groom of my dreams…

 

no happy medium May 11, 2009

Filed under: Experiences — marie @ 8:57 am
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What is it about staying up ’til three and awakening at the crack of seven that is so frustrating during finals week?  The fact that I can’t keep up with (or get too far ahead of, I don’t know which) my own body.  Last night–or rather, this morning–I was at the top of my mental game.  I was typing at the speed of thought and comprehending the words on the pages.  The juxtaglomerular apparatus and the loop of Henle alike were under my mastery.  Except, well, when it came to getting rid of all the sugar I ingested yesterevening.  As I lay miserably awake in bed at half past three, the refrain that kept drumming through my inner ear was “one hundred percent of the glucose in the blood is reabsorbed into the blood after secretion into the nephron.” One hundred percent.  Which meant that no matter how much I knew about the kidneys (sorry, Anna), they wouldn’t make it any easier to get to sleep.  I was doomed to be restless.

And so it was that when my roommate’s alarm sounded at six, I also awoke.  I cocooned myself in my blanket, turning away from the sound and the light, but it was too late.  My heart was already racing, my sugar-infested blood feeding all my hungry little mitochondria until they, too, were bouncing off the walls like toddlers after a chocolate milkshake.  “It’ll be time to get up soon! Wake up!” And, of course, they wouldn’t leave me alone, not even after I actually did get up.  Even now, three hours later, I can’t shake them.

But neither can I be productive with my consciousness.  In just over a half hour I begin the first of two final exams for today, and I cannot concentrate at all on either of them.  There’s no time to sleep before then, nor is there the willpower to focus my mental efforts until then.  I suppose I’ll just have to cras$&*@#%$%